Monday, 14 July 2014

Atos second attempt

So just had the second attempt at a home assessment by ATOS for PIP but since the company requires an audio cd of the audio recorded assessment we had to reschedule again as the cd-r's I ordered have not arrived yet. I haven't owned or used cd-r's in almost 15 years. Do people still use them?
The woman who is doing the assessment on me is very kind and understanding. She seems like someone you can trust and be at ease with but who knows what ATOS themselves and the DWP will do with her report once it's done. Ignore it perhaps?

I was so anxious about todays assessment that I was physically sick all last night. The sheer terror of having to interact with someone on any level, no matter how understanding and nice, is overwhelming. People have to be the most terrifying thing on the planet. As I get older this phobia only gets stronger.

Time to take more painkillers. I can already feel the more painful migraine forming.

Not a very helpful post or past few posts I know and not what I had intended for to be written in this blog at all from what was originally posted last year but I found that I have to be very careful not to repeat myself. I do this often without realising and theres only so much you can talk about in regard to mental health. Though there are still lots of topics to tackle that I haven't touched I don't know how to approach them. This is going to take some time.
As for the more unrelated posts like this one and similar ones before it should I delete them? I don't feel they serve any real purpose in helping people and just degrades this blog into a personal rant site which is not what I had intended at all. I am so frustrated and angry with myself.